COMPLETELY

 

 

Against My Will

Against My Will

Lying here trying not to think,

I think of you against my will, against my want

As though bidden by some dark pulling

That cannot be broken by force.

I seem to feel your eyes

Looking for me in the moon's light

Raking across the ceiling of your room

Willing me to look for you.

But there's no me for you to find now

My form has gone where the broken go

To the valley of trampled hearts

And misdirected dreams.

I went unwillingly,

But of necessary need

For self preservation

And fear of unanswered questions.

Oh, I still feel you, still see you faintly

Maybe not with the usual five,

(Senses that all beings have)

But with a sixth sense unusually honed.

You see, I've never been ordinary, not really

That's what drew you to me,

Led you to me, made you love me,

Bound us in unexplainable, unbreakable chains.

You needed no enchantments for that,

No candles burning at midnight,

No murmured chants, no recitations from ancient books,

No magic at all or ever.

It was love that drew us,

Led us, found us, bound us

Encircled us with her hands

And threaded us together as one.

But it was love, as well,

That broke the threads, the binding,

The defining and entwining

And put out the candles glowing in the dark.

It was love that healed and love that cut

And love that lost it's way

And yet tonight in quietest quiet

Your heart still calls to mine.

Your need has no definition,

Your wanting burns as though unquenched,

Your desire screams without a voice,

As your arms hold to my memory.

I feel you, even now

Across the miles and marbled mountains

Tossing and turning like an ocean's wave

Drawing me to you willingly, as before....

And failing that, against my will.

And failing that, against my will.

©by Voo Shining Stone

9/19/2020

Never Say

 

Never Say

Never say that word again

The word I hate to hear

When you get bent all out of shape

And give in to your fear.

You know I’m here or you should know

By now through all of this

That I would take you in my arms

And soothe you with a kiss.

And even if I cannot be

With you when you need me

I’m still there in this heart of mine

I’d think by now you’d see.

That I would give the world to you

If only it were mine

And I would make you king of it

Beside me for all time.

This world is such a lonely place

And we all need each other

And I don’t mean to overwhelm

And I don’t mean to smother.

It’s just that in my heart of hearts

I feel too much to bear

And I know you feel too much, too

But you don’t want to share.

And how that scares me, how it hurts

To be shut out from you

When all your pain calls out my name

And I can’t comfort you.

I may not be a queen to you

And far from your ideal

But I am true and I love you

And all I am is real.

Can you not feel this hand of mine

Reaching in the dark?

That fire that blazed up long ago

Is down to just a spark.

The light has gone out of the world

Cause I can’t feel your love

And you won’t speak so I must seek

The face of God above.

On your behalf, more so on mine

Because I grieve for you

Pushing me out of your life

In all you say and do.

You said to just leave you alone

You said to go away

And all the sunshine left my skies

And became a cloudy day.

And you walked off and left me there

With nothing in my hand

And shouted as you walked away

Go find yourself a man!

Like you were not the man I love

Like you were not a man

Like you saw yourself as just a grain

In a universe of sand.

And you would never be much more

No matter what you did

No matter how tall you could grow

You’d be a little kid.

I wanted so to run after you

And show you, you were wrong

To ask you how I could sing again

When you're my only song.

But I just waited till you returned

And slipped back in the door

Knowing things were not the same

The way they were before.

You do not talk but you say so much

In your silence, there’s a din

Of alibis from a heart that cries

The word I can’t hear again.

I cannot stand the word Goodbye

It tears my soul in two

You twist it in me like a knife

And make me bleed with you.

And though I bleed, I do not leave

Or run from you for cover

Because I know deep in my soul

That we could heal each other.

©by Voo

A Tender Lie by Restless Heart