Thursday, June 1, 2017


Precious Things, Broken

Like a jar of clay, cracked
My life has spilled out before you
Floods of tears have flowed like rivers
And still they do not stop.

Why, Lord? I ask and ask again
And You haven't deemed to answer
I look to see Your face
Where it's always been before.

And there is nothing but a shadow
Of the joys of yesterday
Nothing but a whisper
Of the love songs that were played.

Why, Lord? Why?
Why these endless tests and trials
These mazes with no doors?
These sad rooms with no floors?

Yesterday, I thought I'd won the battle
I thought I'd run the course
I thought I'd made You proud of me
I thought I'd get to rest.

And then without warning,
The sky fell down, the sea arose
The sun turned black
And nothing, nothing, made sense anymore.

Every time I grow up
I become a child again
Every time I am free
I become entangled with sorrow.

You know my heart
You know how I think and how I feel
You know who I am and who I'll never be
You know me, Lord! Don't You?

I thought I knew who I was,  at last
And where I was going 
And what I was going to do for You
But now I  see nothing and know even less.

How can a mortal die a thousand deaths
And still survive?
How can a heart keep beating
When it no longer has a life?

If I were an alabaster box, Lord
I could pour out
A fragrance fit to wash Your feet
But there is nothing in me now that's sweet.

I am a crushed red rose lying on a road
And all the enemies I ever had
Are marching over me, laughing
Taunting me, saying, "Where's your God?!"

And I'll admit: I don't know where You are
Not now, not since......this...this....test
That I have so obviously failed
Again for the millionth time.

Yesterday I had the faith to move mountains
Yesterday I had the fire shut up in my bones
Yesterday I had the tongue of a preacher
And my lips were as the pen of a ready writer.

But all the words are gone
Dried up like dust in an abandoned mine
And the spark inside me is so low
I can't even see it in the dark.

Lord, help me!!!! Hear my heart!
Give me back Your presence
And the safety of Your wings
I am tossed to and fro like a sparrow's feather.

A sparrow, that's what You called me
And that's all I ever wanted to be
A baby bird growing to maturity
Under Your care and the shelter of Your love.

I didn't think I could ever hurt like this again
I didn't think You'd ever allow it
But You did, You did and I don't know what to do now
I don't know how to feel because I no longer feel...You.

Are You watching me from somewhere up there in Heaven?
Are You putting these words in my mind
And making me write them down?
Or is this the only way I have to cry out to You?

Everything I have ever loved has been taken, Lord!
Every safety net has been pulled out from under me
Every thing I trusted in has stabbed me in the back
And every hope I had has fled away in destitution.

Why, Lord? Why? I thought the wheel had stopped
And I had been remade enough to make the grade
All those years of polishing, refinishing, refining
And yet here I am again in a pile of broken plates.

All those precious things..............
All the people I loved.....
All the prayers I prayed.....
All broken now and scattered to the wind, unanswered.

And even now, Lord, I love You enough to say
Let me come home, let me be where You are
Let me lay every broken thing in my life, in me
At Your feet, at the only place that they can be made whole.

©by Voo
Jan 20, 2015
12:55 a.m.

Falling Slowly by Brian Crain