Goofy Things and Quotes

Be brief, no matter how long it takes!

"You can't have everything. Where would you put it?"

"Women who seek to be equal with men lack ambition.”

"Have you ever noticed that anybody driving slower than you is an idiot, and anyone going faster than you is a maniac?"

"Success is just failure that hasn't happened yet."

“I'm sure the universe is full of intelligent life. It's just been too intelligent to come here.” 

“The capacity for friendship is God's way of apologizing for our families.” 

“It could be that your purpose in life is to serve as a warning to others.”

“Fate is like a strange, unpopular restaurant filled with odd little waiters who bring you things you never asked for and don't always like.” 

“Everything happens for a reason. Sometimes the reason is you're stupid and make bad decisions.”

Cockman-Dickman

Just when Ms. Cockman thought she was finally about to get rid of the horrible surname that had plagued her youth, she went and fell in love with this guy. Talk about jumping out of the frying pan and into the flame. 

The Poore-Sapp wedding

My boss told me to have a good day...
so I went home.

Don't even ask........( ok, yes, it's me)

Seeing Voo for first time.......

An elderly man was stopped by the police around 2 a.m. and was asked where he was going at that time of night. The man replied, "I'm on my way to a lecture about alcohol abuse and the effects it has on the human body, as well as fooling around and staying out late." The officer then asked, "Really? Who's giving a lecture at this time of night?" The man replied, "That would be my wife."”

to be continued.......
maybe....
maybe not....
maybe...

"Got any candy, Mister?
'Cause I like candy....."

A man and a woman are sleeping together when suddenly there is a noise in the house, and the woman rolls over and says, "It's my husband, you have to leave!" The man jumps out of bed, jumps through the window, crawls through the bushes, and out on the street, when he realizes something. He goes back to the house and says to the woman, "Wait, I'm your husband!" She replies giving him a dirty look, "So why did you run?"



NEWS FLASH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

god, I love Irony!!!!