HELL BEHIND THE DOOR

Hell Behind The Door

As I lay dying, I thought

I thought………

Surely not

Surely it’s not going to end

Not like this.

But then, life had long ceased

Being a sunrise………

On my cold heart

More a constant setting

And a continual twilight.

Reaching back into memory,

I pulled you to the forefront…….

Cleared the cobwebs

And dusty dreams

Strewn like spoils of war.

I stood you there

Before my face……….

And silently opened your eyes

Those beautiful things

That still take my breath away.

No, I can’t do it, not now

I can’t bear your seeing……

What I’ve become,

What I remain,

Until the last breath whispers to silence.

Shuttering my eyes

With fragile hands……

I sink into the cobalt blue

Of lonely bed clothes

And pillows where no head but mine has lain.

Where does love go

When it dies……..

And how does it come back

When it is beckoned?

Only God knows.

The lace at the window sways,

And air that stirs the gloom……

Finds no place to rest

And soon departs,

Sighing.

Not even the breeze

Is my friend…………

Not even the nightingale

Sings for me now

For I am condemned.

This prison I have made,

With my own hands……..

Clings to my skin like melted silver,

Shackles my soul,

With invisible chains.

Soon, they will come for me

And I will leave this place…….

Going beyond the shadows

To a vineyard beyond memory,

Where the memories of my mind will be wrung dry.

Or so they tell me,

But I don’t know……..

For the guards are all liars

And murderers and thieves

Like me.

Even though I lived in beauty,

And sat in splendor’s lap…….

I am a liar

But even still I grasp at life

While death runs through my hands.

You were the only thing,

I’ve ever loved……..

You were the only love

I did not steal

But the only love I could not keep alive.

Tossing and turning now,

I burn in my need for hope………

But hope does not come,

Is elusive, even in my dreams,

And turns it’s face and runs.

I feel my life slipping away,

Through my veins and out…….

Into the silkened sheets

And darkness

Waving goodbye to me by lantern light.

Renewed in death,

I find myself again in youth……

A perfect flower, blooming, fair

Strong on my feet, I twirl in mystery

Around and around, in the cold still air.

I see the lock turn,

Hear the chains fall away………

And the door slowly opens

I take a breath that burns my lungs

And approach my long sought freedom.

Perhaps I’ll find you there,

Somewhere in another life waiting……..

Forgiveness shining in your eyes

And tenderness in your touch

Oh, love, to know the taste of love once more!!

To start anew,

To make you want me…….

Like I did so long ago

A queen with royal scepter raised

As men bowed at my feet.

I feel the rush of pride and power,

Overtaking, pulling me……..

No prisoner now,

I feel the guilt

Falling from my shoulders.

All the years of living with myself,

Knowing what I was.……..

I am...... and more

From life to death, I pass 

But to my horror:

Find nothing there but Hell behind the door.

©by Voo

March 19, 2012

11:11 p.m.

DANCING TO A SLOW DEATH

Incredible song that they are dancing to.....

In Line by Robert Skoros

❤

Dancing To a Slow Death

Darkness falls

And with it........

The hunger

The longing for a soft caress,

A tender touch, a hard embrace,

Building to a violent need

And release of what’s inside.

You watch me

From the shadows.........

Breathing

Still as wind that does not blow

And rain that does not fall

Waiting like a cat with prey

Playing with it’s dinner.

And I, with my defenses down

On full alert.......

Dance in the mirror

In candle’s glow

And summer’s rising heat

Pretending I am quite alone

But knowing you are there.

In silks, I twirl

My body......

Like a breeze

Move my hands in beckoning

And my feet in silent pleas

The music swells and I can feel

Your dark eyes touch my skin.

Beyond the room

In midnight’s garden.....

Behind the trees and shining moon

Your black hair laying 

Upon your shoulders,

Your black eyes glowing,

And tasting me.

I turn at your whisper

And there you are.....

In the doorway like a dream that comes

Before the break of dawn

Clad in black from head to toe

With white touches at your throat

And the sight of you makes me weak.

“Don’t fall yet.” you say

And catch me..........

In arms of steel

“The night is young and so are you,

And the sun is fast asleep.”

And you hold me till I catch my breath

Then you take it away again.

Wetting my mouth with wine

I drink............

Knowing that wine can’t satisfy

The thirst I have, have always had

Since I laid my eyes on you,

Since I put my hands on you,

Since I gave myself to you.

The music commands

And we obey.........

My arms round your shoulders

Your arms round my waist

The room awash in shades of gold,

Like the flickering fire

That’s building between us.

I know you will leave me

Before the sun rises........

As you always have

And you always will

But for now in your eyes

Is all I’ll ever need, is all I’ll ever want

And the sunlight be damned.

Midnight passes

And we stand still as stone.......

Drown in the yearning, die in desire

Lifting my face, I wait for your kiss

Burning with hunger that can never be quenched

The shadows of night put their soft arms around us

And to the music of passion, we slow dance again.

©By Voo

Sept 15, 10

12:32 a.m.

POEM OFF THE TOP a spur of the moment write

Imagine Richard Pryor saying this as the old man..........

Poem Off The Top

Don't go there.
It's dangerous.

"LECTRIC wires and such
danglin'
janglin' like coins on a dead man's eyes.

you say you want a revolution?
then don't talk about it....................
Go out and dingdang do it!!!

Revolve.
Dance like the devil is watchin'
And tryin' to steal your steps.

Shake your fist in his face and say, Shoo!

LISTEN. I used to be a ballet dancer in a freakish side show
    They made us  pirouette 24/7
till our toes turned into granite and then fell off
(It was beautiful but it was no fun).

Papa was a rollin' stone
But Mama was made outta moss
Hence: No Body in our house was happy.

Use to, things were like they were s'post to be, y' know?
Nowadays, nothin' works til technicians come out and charge you fifty-five dollars an hour and then it breaks down again just as soon as

they get in their Geek Squad cars and drive away. GEEK cars, ain't that what they call 'em? Geek cars!!
More like freak cars!!

Life is a cabaret, my friend.
Only, Judy Garland is dead and gone
and nobody can sing torch songs no more
Songs are illustrated by pyROtechNeeks and laser lights
And you really can't tell if they on key or not
Lawd knows I'd like to take a dang torch to most of 'em!

I'm just settin' here in this here swing
On my porch, observin', mindin' my own dang business
And you little punk, hop hip, hippity hop, Milk Dud snorting wise asses
Just come jivin' along makin' fun of life and all that is wholly, holey holy carryin'them BOOM bADA BING boom boxes
turned up so damn high you shake the tennie shoes off tha 'Lectric wires!! 

(You know why my grandson throws them shoes up there on them wires like that? He do it cause he don't want nobody to steal his shoes!!! The idjit!)
And let me tell you, it gets me red in the face and disgustipated!

GET THE HELL OUTTA  MY YARD!
i'll CALL thE CoPs!
no, on second thought.....................
they might be more trouble than you guys.

listen. listen to me.....
If you shut up and turn that &%$#@*$ damn music down, 
I'll give you a whole bag of Milk Duds
And you all can take off down to the park
With the rusted out Monkey Bars and the one seated See Saws
And get your Dud on, Dudes.

What's that?

Hmm. Alrighty then. Be that way.
Just sit down yonder on them steps
AND I'll tell you a story
'bout the old days
when dinosaurs roamed the earth
and there were no In and Outs on every corner,
Just meat markets walking around
on all fours and women hanging round the cliffs
like BIG JUICY berries. Uh hmmm.

I don't care if you believe me or not.
It's true. Read your comic books. That be where
The truth lies......Super Man and stuff like that!

LISTEN.
I gots to go to the store and then I gots to go see my Mama
and then I gots to go down to the jail and see if they found my Daddy
and then, I......I.....
aw, hell.  I'm thinkin' bout something else done happened twenty year ago! hee hee.....ain't I a mess?

Ya'll get on away from here, now, you hear?
I done talked myself out. You shouldn't come by here every day
And make me run myself ragged like this chasin' ya'll off 
I'm old as dirt 
And they ain't no flowers planted in me no more.

Shoo!!!
   and stay away from them 'LECTRIC wIRes!!!!!
lawdamercy, what this world done come to?!
Judy Garland, Judy Garland.............................
Where ARE you now that we need ya, darlin'?

©by Voo

March 31, 2012

3:07 p.m.

"That's right, that's right!!!! 

 What he said! He know what he talkin' 'bout, ya big dummies!"

Theme from Sandford and son

The Man That Got Away

by Judy Garland

Billie Holiday
I'll Be Seeing You

I PLAY FOR YOU A VIOLIN

I Play For You a Violin

I play for you a violin

And song so soft and sweet

I keep my eyes downcast, demure

As I sit at your feet.

I play for hours at your request

Till time has lost it's meaning

And candles burn down to their wicks

And night is slowly weaning.

Before the dawn has fully come

You hold your hand up high

And bid me stop my melody

Arise and say goodbye.

You do not look back at my face

Tearstung and raised to light

You do not see the love I bear

As you pass from my sight.

A servant girl, that's all I am

With gifted hands to play

Sweet melodies to comfort you

From torments of your day.

A king of royal dynasty

A man of power and yet

You find no peace in power's grasp

No love in life's plan set.

And so I play and so you listen

In silence, just we two

Night after night till daylight breaks

And my heart breaks for you.

You have no inkling of the love

I feel there as I play

Pretending you are mine alone

Till morn takes you away.

To kingly duties, kingly demands

The power of life and death

There in your words, there in your hands

There in your very breath.

All day I wait till midnight comes

For the summon and the call

Your weary face so full of woe

Till at your feet I fall.

And I play for you my violin

Pray peace into the gloom

Wait for your sigh with tear filled eyes

As my love fills up the room.

©by Voo

April 28, 2007

3:45 p.m.