ALWAYS SAYIN' GOODBYE

 Some body's Always Saying Goodbye by Anne Murray

Always Sayin' Goodbye



I watch you walkin' away 
Like you tryin' not to break into a run 
And Lord, a- mercy! I feel like screamin' out your name 
But I don't dare, I don't dare
'Cause I know you can't stand no clinging vine. 

"You and me got us a good thang going." you always say
Five seconds after you step inside that door 
Just before you grab me up in your arms 
And kiss me like a man just got outta prison 
But that ain't what you say when you walkin' away.

Sometimes I stand out here on the front porch 
When the evenin' is hot and I got the blues so bad 
I just wanna sit and cry my eyes out 
But I come out here and I watch that road and I hope
And I pray and I wish on ever God-Almighty star in that dark heaven.

Wishin' you'd come a-boundin' up that old weedy path
Smilin' that smile and carryin' that old suitcase 
Full of clothes that need washin' and songs that need singin',
Sayin' how much you missed me and how much you love me
And that you comin' home and this time, you gonna stay.

Nobody knows how bad I hurt but the good Lord 
Nobody sees how knotted up inside I am 
'Cause I don't let on to nobody but myself 
That I'm just fadin' away to dust and mis'ry 
Long as you gone, long as you just a memory.

My daddy left my mama all the time 
Left us standin' on that ramshackle old front porch, cryin' 
"Daddy, don't go! Daddy, come back!"
With our little broken hearts and our little empty stomachs 
But that weren't nothin' compared to this.

Why men always gotta leave??
When they got ever thang anybody could ever want 
Right here at home waitin' on 'em when they walk in the door? 
I never could understand that. I never could see no reason for it
There ain't no love out there in that ole world. 

What I wouldn't give to hear "Hello, baby!" right now 
Comin' outta your sweet mouth 
Feel them big strong arms around me 
And that fine frame of yours pressin' up against me 
Like wallpaper on a livin' room wall.

I reckon "Hello" is just about the most wonderful word in the world 
'Specially when you all alone in that world
And nobody notices when you there or when you not
I just need somebody to notice that, you know?
I need you. Dammit to hell! I need you. 

One of these days, boy, you gonna come home 
And ain't nobody gonna be here to greet you! 
I'm gonna be done dead of a broken heart
Dead and buried and gone up to Glory
What you gonna do then? Huh?

Maybe I'll leave a big sign thumb tacked up in the kitchen
Over the table where I eat my lonely meals, 
Cook up banquets that I know you'll never eat, 
Write long letters to you that I never mail
('Cause I wouldn't know where to mail them to no how.)

All that sign gonna say is Goodbye
That somethin' you an expert on 
Somethin' you know how to do better'n anybody on earth 
Lord, I wish you loved me like I love you but you don't
You say you do........................
But real love couldn't leave nobody like that and go walkin' away
Always sayin' goodbye.





          
©By Voo
April 24, 09
2 a.m.

KNOCKING DOWN THE WALLS

                                                   
Knocking Down the Walls



When I was born,
They didn't know what to do with me
I wasn't an ordinary kid
I liked the extraordinary, the different, the bizarre
I needed things they didn't know how to give me
And yet they loved me (at least for a while.)

As I grew older, I began to explore
The universe within my self, 
The universe outside my self
The universe beyond myself.

I didn't know where I fit in
Or how to fit in, or if I fit in,
Or if I ever would fit in
And so I stopped trying to fit in
And I became myself.

The teen aged years were.....
Shall I say, unhinged?
I was a door that didn't know if
I wanted to be open or shut
So I just kind of hung there halfway open,
Halfway shut, half way longing to know
What I didn't know and halfway hoping
That I would never find out.

Because it was a lonely place
Populated by one
Though one with an imaginary community
Of millions, billions, even.........
Of wonderful, awful, fantastic entities
Ambling through my mind 
On their way to some place else.

Most of the time, I felt broken
And broken in a way that no earthly doctor
Could fix
A Borg-like creature from another dimension
With a mechanical brain
And hands that could not touch,
But a human heart that felt oh, so much.

My room, my house, my school, my town
My world...........
Felt small to me and hardly welcoming
A place to exist while I went searching
For the place that felt like home.

I knew too much
And yet never enough
For there was a hunger in me
That nothing could satisfy
And nothing could fulfill
The walls were always so close
I could reach out my hands in the dark
And touch them, touch the ceiling
Touch my own thoughts
As they echoed back and forth to me
In the box that was my life.

But then one day
I learned a secret
And not just any secret
But the secret to me
And what I was and what I would become
And what I would always want to be.

I stood up there one night in the dark
And I took an invisible hammer
And I began to knock down the walls
That held me in, that held me back
And I began to see what I could not see before
Because it was invisible to unseeing eyes
And hidden from unknowing  minds.

I began to hammer away at the tangible
Until I broke through to the intangible
And uncovered the unseen, un-tasted world
That was there all the time beyond a veil
Of thinnest silk, on the other side of my soul.

And I became 
And I became
And I became......me
Out of the box, out of the four walls of a room
Full of emptiness.

And to my wondering eyes, I beheld
Others there like me, others there that had been
Searching all of their lives
For someone to tell them who they were
And why they were and where they were going
And why they were like they were
Some one like me.

And I began to tell them what I knew
And they began to answer questions
I had never asked
But needed desperately to know
And it was wonderful...........
It was the beginning of a new day
And a new world..........
And I flung the door wide open at last
And I walked in.

©by Voo
May 13, 2017
1:41 a.m.

Orange Sky by Alexi Murdoch

UNOPENED BOXES

uNoPeNeD BoXeS



Hearts are like unopened boxes, you see
Packages on Christmas lying under the tree
They're worth more than gold but their contents are free
Hearts are like unopened boxes.

Hearts are like unopened boxes, it's true
There's an unopened box within me, within you
And the box can be golden or be made to turn blue
Hearts are like unopened boxes.

Hearts are like unopened boxes, I think
Empty sometimes or filled to the brink
Cookies from home or some sweet wine to drink
Hearts are like unopened boxes.

Hearts are like unopened boxes, I know
Some full of joyful and some full of woe
Scratched up old records or torn things to sew
Hearts are like unopened boxes.

Hearts are like unopened boxes, that's right
Exposed when they're open, and when closed, dark as night
And only true love can bring the gifts there to the light
Hearts are like unopened boxes.



©By Voo
Jan 06

THE DAMAGE YOU DID TO ME

The Damage You Did To Me



Thinking back on yesterday and all it held in it's hand
Such promise, such hope, such....torment
I can only shake my head in wonder
That I ever believed a single word you said
You silver tongued devil with your savoir faire,
Your joie de vivre, your je ne sais quoi
Your B.S.
I'd like to take your face in my hands
And smash myself into your eyes,
Make you feel the panic I felt
The first time I looked into the mirror
And didn't see you standing there beside me.

Terror even overtook me when I called
Your name and you didn't answer, 
Called your house and another woman
Softly said "Hello."
I thought the world had ended
And nobody told me
But everybody knew I'd been played
And they were laughing in my face
It was hell..................
And I did my time and I survived.

Now undo the damage you did to me
By letting me see you cry and hurt and plead
And die from wanting
I know she left you and that's why you're here
Those wounded eyes are staring into my soul
Searching for consolation and admittance,
Hope reaching out it's hand in tearful silence
Waiting to hear the words you long to hear
Remember yesterday? You ask and I nod my head
And smile. Oh, yes, I remember yesterday, my love
I remember every lovely, bloody thing
And every lovely, bloody lie!
You left me here like damaged goods in the trash heap
Of broken hearts.

Now looking into your sorrowful eyes,
 I feel renewed,
I feel relieved,
I feel reborn 
I remember everything.............
And closing the door in your startled face, 
I hear you gasp and try to speak 
And a moan escapes your throat
As your unbelieving eyes take in my victory
The damage is undone.............
Now take your silver tongue and get the hell out!

© by Voo
 Aug 4, 2005
 midnight

TERRORIST ATTACK

Terrorist Attack

They bombed me last night

Coming in out of nowhere

The darkness lighting up with explosions

That caught me by surprise

Blew me to smithereens

And ravaged me.

Emotions falling

Like hand grenades

Detonating on contact, they

Just blew up

Me and my dreams.

Sleep left and panic

Filled in all of the long hours

That had been filled with laughter

And love.

Life changes so fast

And you never see it coming:

The terror. The terrorists

Because you think 

They are your friends.

©by Voo

Jan 1, 2005
 6:07 p.m.