PRECIOUS THINGS, BROKEN

Precious Things, Broken

Like a jar of clay, cracked

My life has spilled out before you

Floods of tears have flowed like rivers

And still they do not stop.

Why, Lord? I ask and ask again

And You haven't deemed to answer

I look to see Your face

Where it's always been before.

And there is nothing but a shadow

Of the joys of yesterday

Nothing but a whisper

Of the love songs that were played.

Why, Lord? Why?

Why these endless tests and trials

These mazes with no doors?

These sad rooms with no floors?

Yesterday, I thought I'd won the battle

I thought I'd run the course

I thought I'd made You proud of me

I thought I'd get to rest.

And then without warning,

The sky fell down, the sea arose

The sun turned black

And nothing, nothing, made sense anymore.

Every time I grow up

I become a child again

Every time I am free

I become entangled with sorrow.

You know my heart

You know how I think and how I feel

You know who I am and who I'll never be

You know me, Lord! Don't You?

I thought I knew who I was,  at last

And where I was going 

And what I was going to do for You

But now I  see nothing and know even less.

How can a mortal die a thousand deaths

And still survive?

How can a heart keep beating

When it no longer has a life?

If I were an alabaster box, Lord

I could pour out

A fragrance fit to wash Your feet

But there is nothing in me now that's sweet.

I am a crushed red rose lying on a road

And all the enemies I ever had

Are marching over me, laughing

Taunting me, saying, "Where's your God?!"

And I'll admit: I don't know where You are

Not now, not since......this...this....test

That I have so obviously failed

Again for the millionth time.

Yesterday I had the faith to move mountains

Yesterday I had the fire shut up in my bones

Yesterday I had the tongue of a preacher

And my lips were as the pen of a ready writer.

But all the words are gone

Dried up like dust in an abandoned mine

And the spark inside me is so low

I can't even see it in the dark.

Lord, help me!!!! Hear my heart!

Give me back Your presence

And the safety of Your wings

I am tossed to and fro like a sparrow's feather.

A sparrow, that's what You called me

And that's all I ever wanted to be

A baby bird growing to maturity

Under Your care and the shelter of Your love.

I didn't think I could ever hurt like this again

I didn't think You'd ever allow it

But You did, You did and I don't know what to do now

I don't know how to feel because I no longer feel...You.

Are You watching me from somewhere up there in Heaven?

Are You putting these words in my mind

And making me write them down?

Or is this the only way I have to cry out to You?

Everything I have ever loved has been taken, Lord!

Every safety net has been pulled out from under me

Every thing I trusted in has stabbed me in the back

And every hope I had has fled away in destitution.

Why, Lord? Why? I thought the wheel had stopped

And I had been remade enough to make the grade

All those years of polishing, refinishing, refining

And yet here I am again in a pile of broken plates.

All those precious things..............

All the people I loved.....

All the prayers I prayed.....

All broken now and scattered to the wind, unanswered.

And even now, Lord, I love You enough to say

Let me come home, let me be where You are

Let me lay every broken thing in my life, in me

At Your feet, at the only place that they can be made whole.

©by Voo

Jan 20, 2015

12:55 a.m.


Falling Slowly by Brian Crain

WARRIORS OF THE WAY EPISODE 17 Banquet For The Beast

WARRIORS OF THE WAY

EPISODE SEVENTEEN

BANQUET FOR THE BEAST



     The creature stood a mere twenty-five or thirty feet from me as I peeked out from a non-glowing tree. I stifled a gasp and wondered what he would do next. ( I wondered what I would do next!) I had no idea. No plan. No escape route. No horse in the forest directing my actions. No one. "Please!" I begged silently to the guiding voice but heard nothing. "I need you!" I reached for an arrow and put it to the bow but before I could steady my hand, the wereman had strode nearer to me on quiet feet and stopped in the moonlight. I gulped air and pulled myself up as tall as I could manage but felt tiny and insignificant in comparison to the silvery beast. Trembling like a leaf, I let fly an arrow, then another and another, all missing their mark, all falling vainly to the ground. The creature swerved with graceful movements, dodging the arrows as a child might dodge a ball. Frustrated, I grasped a dagger and flung it at his heart but he caught it in his left hand and stood there with an almost human look of amusement in his dark eyes. I quickly reached for another dagger but the first dagger was thrown back at me with such force that it knocked me backwards and pinned me, helpless, by my garment against a tree.

     "No!" I cried and attempted to pull my way free but I could not before the beast was upon me, his claws around my neck, his fetid breath upon my face. He gazed into my frightened eyes until my legs gave way then threw his head back and howled an ear piercing howl that turned my insides to wax, my soul to despair. "Fear not." I heard the voice say at last  and I retorted, "That's easy for you to say!" before I knew what I was doing. I had never spoken back to the voice before. I had always accepted and obeyed and responded in gratitude. I had lost my way! Given in to rebellion! "Forgive me!" I pleaded in a hoarse whisper, "But I've never been a banquet for a beast before! Surely, you understand!" The wolf creature went quiet and held his shaggy head as if listening, his ears on alert and a questioning growl coming from his throat. He looked in all directions, then back into my eyes and released his grip on my throat. I slumped against the tree and felt for the sword at my side. There was not much I could do until I freed myself but I hadn't much strength left. The beast stood back and watched me warily but did not touch me. Mustering a bravado I did not feel, I straightened up and shouted at him, "And from what level of Hell didst thou come, Animal!?"


     Wrenching myself back and forth, I felt the dagger in my left sleeve give way and I fell forward onto the creature. For a strange few seconds, I felt myself enveloped in two hairy arms and pressed tightly to the wereman's chest as he smothered me against him. He howled...... I howled..... and butted my head against him as hard as I could and pulled myself away and went running back to the arbor and jumped up into the bunk. Grabbing more weapons, I made as much noise as I possibly could, screaming and screeching like a banshee and as he approached, began to fire arrows and daggers and lastly, my spare shoes. "Get away! Get away, foul beast!" I shouted and threw a fur blanket upon his head. It was so dark I could barely see and could not effectively do my worst. He had the advantage on me with his wolf's eyes and kept coming no matter what I did. Grabbing at me as I slunk back into the far corners of the arbor kicking, his eyes fell upon the glint of gold from the music box and stopped and grabbed it with his furry paws. (Oh, how had it fallen out of it's bag?!) As he held it aloft in wonder, the lights from the pale trees blinked back on and we both froze in amazement. My chance had come!


     Summoning all the strength from the bottom of my soul, I sprang forward, grasped the sword with both hands and swung it at his head. The blade caught him in the left eye and he screamed a piteous scream and grabbed for his face with his left paw, never letting go of the music box in his right. Blood streamed down the white furry face and into his snout as he snarled and wriggled and cried out in agony. His two companions rushed to his aid. They ran towards us growling furiously, leaving the man still lying by the dying fire. There was no where to go! I was trapped in the arbor! My heart pounding, I began to pull on the skins that were attached to the branches and trees and pulled them down upon my head. In the melee, I heard the beasts grunting noisily as they attempted to find me in the covers. They reached into the bunk with their horrible hands and clawed this way and that but could not penetrate the multitude of heavy skins.

      Suddenly, they stopped and withdrew but I dared not peek out even if I could have. I heard a muffled sound behind me and felt a movement. No! I pleaded silently. I could not get to my sword. I was done for! The swoosh of an arrow passing above my covered head took me by surprise and I heard the yelp of a wereman and then a mighty thud as he fell. Cries issued from terrified throats, (one of which was mine) and a loud and lengthy battle ensued all around me and at several points, on top of me. I moved to get out of the way, grateful for whatever help had been granted but could not imagine who had been sent to my aid. Finally, all was quiet and I waited long fearful seconds and began scrambling out of the heavy shield of skins.

      When my eyes adjusted, I saw the body of a wereman four feet from me, lying upon it's back with an arrow protruding from it's chest. The creature was brown. There was no sign of the others nor of my defender. I jumped to the ground with my bloody sword in hand and cautiously approached the beast. I kicked it with my toe. It did not move. I noted the strange white arrow and touched it. It burned my hand! Gasping, I fell back, then caught myself and stumbled upon a hideous object:  A brown furry arm and clawed hand, covered in blood and clutching a piece of fabric. It made a strange sizzling noise which frightened me all the more. I took a deep breath and ran in the direction of the camp, toward the fire that was barely more than coals.  I saw the man still lying there deep in sleep and oblivious to all the danger and death going on around him. I was puzzled. How could anyone sleep through all that? Was he dead? Or dying? Had the medicine he had swallowed rendered him completely unconscious? I looked towards the black trees and caught a movement in the moon's glow.

     The silvery white wolf monstrosity had pulled his wounded companion to his feet and slung him over his shoulder. (I noted he was missing an arm.) For a brief moment, he stopped and looked in my direction and I felt the rage and torment in him as he threw back his head and howled a long and threatening howl that echoed into the night and bounced off the boulders and surrounded me. I stood defiant in the moonlight, clutching my sword above my head and claimed the victory. I held my breath as he turned to walk into the forest then exhaled smugly and shouted, "Thou hast lost, Beast!" Then to my shock and sorrow,  I saw in the light of the setting moon, the unmistakable gold of my music box held up proudly in the beast's right hand.

     Speechless, I sank to my knees in the hard mud. Anything but that! Anything! Take anything from me but that! My soul began to sob deep inside without sound but could not contain it and I wailed and wept aloud for my loss. It was all I had left from childhood to love and cherish. Except for my teacher's books and a lone pressed flower kept within two pages of The Book Of The Kingdoms. It was all. All. I had lost everything. "Oh, Starshine!" I sobbed, " I need thee! Father, please! Please, tell me what to do! Why must I lose everything most precious to me? Why? I don't want to do this anymore! I want to come home! Please, may I come home? I can't bear anymore!"

     And I wept and wept until I was exhausted and my voice was weak and spent with crying. Dragging myself to my feet, I wearily thought to make my way to the horses' arbor and let Snow comfort me in her equine way. I needed the touch of another. I glanced towards the man's still form and broke out in fresh weeping. I was sure he was dead now. Of course, he was dead! Why wouldn't he be? My loss was complete. I shrank to a tiny bit of nothing in my grief and with slow, laborious steps began to stumble toward the horses. My mind was numb and my body felt ancient and ready to turn to dust. I could hardly remember my name. My name.... My name!" I thought in the depths of my despair. Someone was calling my name! I looked tiredly about but saw no one. "I am delusional now." I thought, "My mind has snapped like a twig. That's what I deserve for being headstrong and rebellious. Everybody warned me. Everybody. But I never listened. Now I'm being punished."

     "I suppose I should save the fire." I said to the empty air and walked back and threw more sticks and branches onto the embers and fanned them into a flame. As I stooped there tending to the task, tears rolled down my cheeks and fell hissing into the fire. I was so mentally, physically, spiritually debilitated that I did not feel the hand touching my shoulder. And I did not feel it still until it shook me hard and a voice said sternly into my ear, "Vaangelika!" Finally, the word pierced the fog of my brain, and I sprang to my feet and attempted to draw my sword. Then I was halted by the sight of the blue-eyed man who stayed my hand and smiled forlornly at the confusion on my lost and lonely face. I looked at the form lying behind him still wrapped in cloak and blanket, still wearing his boots. I looked at the barefoot man before me. I looked away.

      Rubbing my desperate eyes, I mumbled, "You're not real. None of this is real. I'm insane." Seconds passed, dreamlike, until I heard the horses stirring in their shelter and Snow's voice calling out to shake me from my insensibility. "Vaangelika, look!" the man said, rushing to the form lying on the ground. He threw back the covers and cloak, picked up the boots and held them in front of my eyes. "It was a ploy! I was never there! See? It's me, Little Flower! I'm not dead! I'm here! I'm not an apparition. I'm here." And trying to comprehend what could not be comprehended, I fainted dead away and collapsed in a heap on the ground. The sword dropped from my hand and I fell into deep darkness, not knowing what was real or unreal anymore. It was all, simply, too much.

Fabrizio Paterlini - Far Away From Here

incredible music to play here at end of this episode

Arvo Pärt- Spiegel im Spiegel

                          TO BE CONTINUED IN EPISODE 18......

https://bluevineyard.blogspot.com/2017/06/warriors-of-way-episode-18-dost-thou.html

WARRIORS OF THE WAY EPISODE 16 Moonlight Madness

WARRIORS OF THE WAY

EPISODE SIXTEEN

MOON LIGHT MADNESS




         I could not say how long we stood there. He appeared calm and pleased but I was trying to comprehend what had just happened to me, to us.  There was no reasonable explanation for any of it, save for miracle or (delusion). Snow and Redemption waited patiently for us to pull apart and when we did not after ten minutes or so, they snorted, touched noses and turned back for their arbor. The deer followed them and soon we were standing alone in the night. I could no longer hear the snarls of the wolf creature and the forest seemed to be asleep but watchful. Within the camp, the atmosphere seemed changed completely. It was not a feeling you could describe but one that no mortal being could ever forget, even after long passages of time. I didn't want to let go of the moment and held tightly to the man, fearing that if I let go of him, the wondrous, magical...what? Thing? Rescue? Dream? What could I call it? Event.....would evaporate into the realms of imagination.


      Remembering the golden glow and the sweet ecstatic warmth pouring over me as I lay helpless in it's presence was too precious to lose. I didn't want to speak and spoil the sacred silence. So I held him and waited. Finally, he pulled back and looked into my eyes, then kissed my forehead and let me go. Caught off guard, I lost my balance and struggled to keep myself upright. He turned back to catch me and we both tumbled to the ground, peals of helpless laughter erupting from our mouths and lastly, from our souls. It was cleansing laughter, joyful laughter, the laughter of awe. We laughed until tears streamed down our dirty faces and catching sight of one another, laughed all the more. "Don't laugh at me!" I scolded breathlessly and threw a pebble at him. He ducked and pretended to throw a handful of dirt my way."Don't laugh at me!" he warned and collapsed upon the ground, giving in to the exhaustion and release. I looked up to see the deer peek his head out of the boulders and broke into fresh gales until the pain in my side bid me stop.


     Suddenly aware of the wounds on the man's cheek and arm, I sobered and looked around to see if there was any un-spilled water or provisions with which to nurse him. Rubbing his eyes, he said, "There's some containers of water inside the horses' arbor and some cloths and ointment in my deerskin bag. The arm is giving me some pain now but the face will be alright. I needed some scars to give it character." Pain flashed in his eyes and I smiled at him and rushed to get what was needed. I didn't want to leave him there alone in the dirt and walked backwards to keep my eyes upon him. He did not know I watched him and slumped lower on the ground and gave a small groan."He's hiding his pain." I thought and wondered if there had been another, unseen wounding. I gave no thought to my own bruises and scratches, blood stained my shirt and hands and my head throbbed but I didn't care about myself but thought only of the man with no name and how I might relieve his suffering. It was best not to think too hard upon things, the mind could only stand so much trauma. I could feel already feel myself trying to process the strangeness and terror,  knowing it was a futile effort. No, I would go over it all later and try to draw a logical conclusion.


      I stoked the fire and threw more wood into it's flames and hurried to my companion's side. "Let's get you out of this dried mud, shall we?" I said and attempted to pull him to his feet. I could not budge him. He lay so un-naturally still that I feared that he was dead and a pain like I have never known ripped through my heart. "Come back!" I pleaded, dropping to my knees, almost overturning the water pot. "Thou cannot leave me! Please! Please! Thou mustn't be dead! Thou mustn't!" Panic overtook me and I dissolved into wails and weeping when he opened his eyes and smiled a small and wonderful smile. "Why, Vaangelika, you sounded as though you......cared."


      I wanted to strike him then and forgot my mourning. "Why did you frighten me so? I thought you were dead!" And the tears streamed down my face and I made no attempt to stop them. He reached and caught a falling tear with his finger and staring at it for a moment, kissed the tear and left it on his lips. I was stunned. "Your tears are precious." he murmured and sat up stiffly. "I don't know that I've ever had anyone weep for me before." "Were you unconscious or sleeping?" I asked, trying now to hide the emotions that undid me. "A little of both, I suppose." he smiled and stood to his feet. "When I was knocked from my horse, the ground did not cradle me tenderly." We walked to a softer spot on the grass and he dropped heavily like a stone and a groan escaped his lips. "Sing to me, Vaangelika." he said as I began to wash the blood away and dress his wounds. I looked at him in amazement, frowning. "Sing?" "Yes. Sing to me. It will take my mind off of the pain."


     I searched my mind for a song, wondering if it was, indeed, possible to sing in this madness. "Wait here." I said quietly, laying down the wet cloths and hurrying to the arbor. I fetched the music box and wound it and opened the lid. The haunting melody of my childhood filled the night air and took me back to safer and happier times. I began to sing the words that went with the music and continued my work upon his painful gashes. The arm wound was deep and frightened me but I did the best I could in washing and applying healing balms then wrapping it with clean white cloths. "Though I am crippled, lame and halt. Though all my dreams have come to naught. Though I was blinded at my life's start. I'm ever dancing.... in my heart." I sang and let the memories that the song evoked take me over and lost myself in it's words and melody. I sang every verse and chorus and when I'd finished, the music box continued on for a few seconds and then fell silent. The sudden quietness made my heart ache and I thought to rewind the box but could not find the strength to do it.


     I sat looking at the fire, lost in my memories and feeling the heartbreak and lonely joy expressed in the song. How strange it made me feel now. Cy-nithia's Song. My crippled, blind nursemaid. Unable to see a rainbow but somehow always joyful. And always diligent in her care of me until the day of her departure. I replayed past recollections of her, humming the melody under my breath until the man reached out to touch my arm and startled, I looked to see tears shining in his eyes. "What a sweet soul you are, Little Flower. What love issued forth from your tongue. That song stirred something in me....that I cannot speak...or recall properly. Some long ago memory, I think, or remnant of thought or........something. Thank you for the gift of your song." I shook my head and my unkempt hair tumbled into my face. "It is not my song. It was given to me." "And now you have given it to me." he said "And I shall never forget it." 


      Handing me a clean cloth dipped in water, he motioned for me to wash my own face and hands and I did so absently and winced when I touched a bruise on my cheek. I didn't want to think about the horrible blood that stained me and my garments. The blood of the Meerjoks. The unthinkable giant and his tiny repulsive brother. What act of unnatural, unspeakable...I could not find the words...and shook my head again and rubbed my tired eyes. "Do not think about it, Vaangelika." he cautioned and dabbed at my face with the cloth. "Pretend it was all a bad dream, like you often do, and put it from your mind. We have come through the experience relatively unscathed and you have another adventure to add to your repertoire." "They wanted to marry me,  for the love of.....!" I groaned, " To have their monstrous babies!" "Yes, they did but they have gone home empty handed and failed in their quest." he observed, lying back down on the grass watching me. I turned to look at him, a sudden thought racing through my mind and asked, "If these men can replicate themselves, then why do they need to produce children with females?" I did not understand the whole idea of it. He was quiet for a few minutes then said in his patient and gentle way, (not unlike the manner of my old teacher) "When once I realized who these men were, I was afraid that we were doomed. My first impression was that they belonged to the tribe of Maarraks residing at the foot of the mountain who are more human than the Meerjoks and could be defeated and sent away. They are not a very intelligent lot, the Maarraks, and can be outwitted by one as cunning as the man you tend to and I was not that concerned, though certainly disturbed."


       He paused to smile at me teasingly and continued when I lifted my eyebrow in response. "The Meerjoks have struck fear into the hearts of men and beasts hereabouts for many years. True, they have the ability to regenerate themselves but I suppose it gets tiresome watching one's self reform again and again and again and so they find themselves longing for new additions to the clan." "But where are the women of their clan?" I interrupted and he held up his hand and went on. "I have heard it said that there never were any female Meerjoks. That they have always had to raid other peoples for wives and that all of those wives eventually escape or die or.....worse. I don't recall the entire legend but evidently, they have plundered all of their neighbors' bounties and have come at last to sharing one solitary wife among them."
"Meaning me." I sighed and shuddered. "One wife and a hundred men." My stomach turned and I put my hand to my mouth. "You do realize that I was prepared to die before that happy occasion, do you not?" "Yes, I was well aware of your plan." he said, "And I cannot say that I could blame you. Death would be preferable to Skaarkap and Ot-tay, that is certain. And the Prince who failed miserably in his whirlwind courtship of you.......now, that was a nasty brute! I must say that you left a lasting impression upon them all! Especially the little fellow. You should have seen your face when his head went flying at the urging of your sword! I don't know who was the most surprised!"


     "Oh!" I chided, "I don't know. I'm used to that sort of thing. Did you see Skaarkap's face when I chopped off that odd jewel in his forehead? I don't understand the purpose of that. Was the jewel actually part of him when he was born or was it inserted...later?" The man did not answer me for some time and then stated, "Come to think of it, I don't believe the jewel replicated itself. I seem to recall that it was still missing when his head grew back. I shall have to think upon the matter." "I think you're right." I said standing to my feet and picking up the music box. "The ruby was not there. I wonder what it means? Not that I care. But I wonder what it means." And I left him and walked back to the arbor and hid the box in my belongings. Returning, I asked, "Is it alright if I retrieve my weapons now? They are far away from me and I feel the need to have them near. When you told me to lay my weapons down earlier, I thought you had lost your senses." I stopped to look down at him and he gave me a crooked smile and softly said, "I was thinking the exact same thing at the time. It made no sense whatsoever to me. But I was not the one in control. And look at the magnificent way it all turned out!" "Yes, indeed." I agreed and made my way towards the tall gray stones where Snow eyed me with a very human expression as her white face appeared in the opening. "Thou art a very wise horse." I said throwing my arms around her neck in greeting. "And a very brave one." And she nodded up and down and neighed to show me that of that fact, she was already aware.


      I made sure that there was water still in it's container for them and found a bag full of apples and poured them out on the ground for the horses and gave one to the deer who lay there staring at me like I was his mother. He didn't seem to have any intention of leaving our company and the horses seemed to like him rather well which was an odd thing but in this place, oddities appeared to be normal. I shrugged and bid them all a goodnight and gave them all heartfelt hugs of gratitude. Gathering up the weapons, I went outside and picked up all of the discarded weaponry there where the man had dropped them and made my way back to where he lay. He stirred as I approached and asked, "Everything proper and in order?" "Yes." I answered and laid his sword and bow beside him and looked around the camp for any arrows that had survived their usage. I saw several and went to pick them up. They looked in relatively good shape despite the fact that they had pierced the flesh of monstrous men. (If they could be called that.) I had a supply in the arbor and I supposed the man did too but there was no need to let these go to waste. "You're thrifty." he called out to me, sitting up. "I like that in a woman." "Waste not, want not." I called back and spied two arrows close to the entrance of the black forest. Well, those two would certainly be wasted! I wasn't venturing close to that hellish place again! I filled my sheath with all of the arrows that I recognized as mine and took the remainder to their owner.


      "Hmmm." he marveled, taking them. "None the worse for wear, I see. Interesting." "I wonder why the blood is still there?" I thought out loud. "Why does the blood not disappear?" "I don't know." he said frankly. "Honestly! I do not know everything, no matter what you believe!" "I don't believe that." I said and turned away so that he could not see me smile. I gathered up plenty of firewood and found the scattered cooking pots and pans and the water flasks where they had been flung. "Art thou....you... thirsty?" I asked and handed him a full flask. I was tired. And sleepy. Almost too tired to be afraid or concerned about any other intrusions or adventures. My mind was numb and my body was craving the relief of sleep. I vaguely wondered what tonight's sleeping arrangements were and was not surprised when the man said,"I shall sleep here by the fire and keep it burning. You'll be safe in the arbor. I don't require much sleep and you look dead on your feet. Don't worry about me. I'll be fine here. Just bring me a couple of skins and a cloak or two and I'll make my bed here. I don't anticipate trouble but one never knows. The Weremen are still out there and the moon is.....full." And at that, I looked up to see the moon rising in the sky, covering the ground with an eerie light.


     "I think I'd rather have another thunderstorm." I muttered and he laughed softly, "Vaangelika! I thought last night was the worst night of your life! You hardly slept a wink between the lashings of rain and the playing with my hair!" I blushed and waved my weary hand at him and he chuckled as I walked away. I hurried to fetch the skins and cloaks and took and deposited them near the head of the reclining man and made my retreat. "Goodnight, Little Warrior. Sleep the sleep of the innocent and the brave." he said softly, getting to his feet. I nodded and stumbled with half closed eyes to the bunk and jumped up into it. Pulling the covers up to my chin and looking again in wonder at the pale glow of the trees before my eyes slammed shut, I made a wish and prayer that the night would be uneventful and that the man would sleep in comfort and wake renewed. And then I fell into deep dreams. I dreamed of Cy-nithia and of her sightless pale brown eyes and soft hands. She was singing to me and her song made me feel like a child again. And then the tone of the song and of the dream changed and a sense of urgency filled my heart. Cy-nithia's mouth was moving and she was still singing but I could not hear her. I could not hear anything. Not a sound. I ran towards her and grabbed at her with my desperate hands but she kept on singing and singing and did not acknowledge me. I raised my hand up to her face and cried as loud as I could but no sound issued forth from me. I screamed her name but she could not hear me. In a frantic state of terror, I swung my arm back and hit her in the face as hard as I could and her face shattered into a thousand pieces. Except for her mouth which kept on singing and singing it's silent song.


      I began to scream and in the screaming woke myself up from the dream and sat upright to find myself tangled in the covers and soaking wet with sweat. "It was just a dream!" I told myself and tried to laugh, brushing back the hair from my damp forehead. I don't know how long I had been asleep. Hours, perhaps. Minutes? I didn't know. I looked to see the position of the moon to discern the time of night but could not see it through the tent of skins over the ledge. A noise caught my attention then and I froze and peered through the darkness toward the campfire. The fire was burning low now and I saw the feet of the man sticking out of the cloak and blankets of skins thrown over him as he slept. His back was to me and my heart pained me at the sight of it. Had it really been last night that I had feared and loathed that back? It seemed like a lifetime ago. So many things had changed in one day's time. My whole life had changed! And I did not know what road it would take tomorrow. In two days time, he said, he would be leaving. Leaving me. Maybe for forever. And if not, how would he ever find me again if I left this place? How would we ever find one another again? The thought of it made me want to cry but I blinked back the tears and started to straighten my bed when I heard the sound of something moving towards the camp on stealthy feet.


      I drew myself up and moaned, "Oh, no. Please! No more tonight! I can't stand anymore! I'm so tired." I thought for a moment to cover my head and pretend that I had not heard a thing, to just go back to sleep. And so I did for twenty seconds. Then I peeked out of the blankets with just my eyes showing and looked across the way. In the firelight's reddish glow, I watched as three tall shaggy creatures walked upright like men to where the man lay sleeping. My heart almost stopped in my chest! I held my breath and closed my eyes, hoping that when I opened them, there would be nothing there to see. Needless to say, it didn't work. It never did. The creatures were probably six and a half feet tall. Dark brown fur, with man like arms and hairy hands with long vicious claws hanging at their sides. At least two of them were brown. One was different with silvery white fur that glowed in the moonlight. On huge feet they crept silently up to the sleeping form and surrounded it. Making motions to one another, they seemed to be planning something and I could only imagine what. The larger of the three, the silvery white creature, leaned down very close to the man and breathed in his scent. His great head went up into the air and he lifted up his giant paw like hands and shook them above his head. Two terrible, glowing red eyes made my body tremble in fear and I shrank back involuntarily, wondering if he knew I was there, watching. Long, sharp white teeth he had and a huge mouth and tongue. I could see saliva dripping from his mouth at the sight of the prey and he exhibited a kind of wild anticipation. The other two motioned for him to hurry and snatch up the meal so that they could be on their way but he stopped in his tracks as his arms reached for the man.


      His head turned in my direction and I gasped as his horrible eyes scanned the trees and the darkness beyond. The pale light from the trees blinked off and disappeared! I could hardly believe my eyes! I was plunged into total darkness. I swallowed hard and began to shiver in fright. My hands shook so hard that I could scarcely hold the blanket together over my face. I lowered my eyes so that he could not see them peering out and hoped that I, too, had disappeared from sight. I did not know what to do. Still the man had not told me about these creatures. There had been no time with the Meerjok battle. I had no idea how to fight them. I frantically tried to recall what little he had told me. In the full moon, he had said, they were   undefeatable. Or practically. Was that what he had said? What about the fire? Something silver. What was it? Oh, I didn't know what to do! I needed him to tell me! But how could I get to him? How could I warn him without alerting the Wolfmen to my presence? Would they slaughter both of us here in our beds? Devour us like rabbits? This had been the longest day of my life! I had dreamed of adventures as a girl sitting in my teacher's school room as he droned on and on about mathematics and history and spelling and reading but this? I had never imagined this! Maybe I should just run out and let them eat me and get it over with! 


     Everything was going from bad to worse. Why prolong the agony? But I didn't want them to harm the man. I couldn't stand the thought of it. Where was Snow when I needed her? Did she not know the situation out here like she did before? There had been not a sound from the horses. Not even the thud of a hoof. Were they sound asleep? Was the whole world sound asleep except for me? I could not do this alone. I tried to gather up my bow and arrows silently in the dark and pulled the weapons close to me and slung them over my exhausted shoulders. I pulled on my boots and slipped a dagger into each of them, into the special sheaths that were made to hold them. Keeping my eyes on the campfire, I slid down to the ground and almost fell in the darkness. Groaning, I put my hand to my lips and muffled the sound. The eyes of the great Wereman kept looking in my direction and he held up one long clawed hand and bid the others to be silent and wait. Then he took three giant strides that covered a great deal of ground and drew close to the place where I stood frozen in fear, my knees buckling at his approach and my heart beating like the heart in the breast of a dove about to die.

                        To be Continued in Episode 17.....

https://bluevineyard.blogspot.com/2017/06/warriors-of-way-episode-17-banquet-for.html




                                     Epic Music.............

ALL I WANT by request

All I Want

Young and ancient in my heart

I yearn to feel alive

I long to feel the touch of love

And know the reasons why

Why life is sad and days are long

Just something to get through

I need to know why I was born

And I want to know the truth

Friends? I never had a friend

At least someone I could trust

I thought I had one who loved me

But all it was was lust

My innocence was lured away

My trusting soul rejected

My emotions killed with cruel disdain

And my heart cries were neglected

All day I search the sky for God

All night I cringe in fear

My sleep is stolen by nightmares

And I feel no angel near

I walk the streets alone and cold

Even in the sunlight's glow

And laugh my bitter hardened laugh

That hides a broken soul

Too young! they tell me, you're too young

To feel like you should die

You have no reason to feel this way

To have sorrow in your eyes

But they don't know, they cannot know

How my heart longs to fly free

They see my youth, my unwrinkled brow

But I know they don't see me

I reach a halting outstretched hand

Sometimes to others when

They slap my hand and I say then

I'll never reach again

This nothingness is heavy

This emptiness is full

How can I believe that kindness lives

When all I see is cruel?

My life is like a bottomless pit

I tumble down and down

In dream and shadow, falling, hopeless

And laughing like a clown

And all I want is for someone

To fill up this widening crack

For God to reach down from the sky

And pat me on the back.

©By Voo

May 27, 2005

 11:30 pm

WARRIORS OF THE WAY EPISODE 15 Rescuing The Rescuers

WARRIORS OF THE WAY

EPISODE FIFTEEN

RESCUING THE RESCUERS



     Snow walked quietly behind the pale trees and into the dense forest beyond them. How she moved so silently, I didn't understand and I fought to keep up with her and walk as noiselessly as she. The sun had set in the west and filled the sky with a blood red stain as it dropped toward into it’s resting place. I dreaded the total darkness that would soon descend and didn't want to be in the wood when it did. The purple twilight gave the trees an eerie, shadowy outline but to my surprise, the tall pale trees behind us began to give forth their unearthly glow and I found that I could see the trail that Snow was making for me to follow. We were circling around the camp and back behind the boulders, that much was evident but what we would do when we got there, I had no idea. The white horse was in charge, not me. I was grateful for the noise of the intruders for I tripped and fell a number of times and groaned out loud before I could catch myself. Snow looked back at me chidingly and motioned for me to keep up. “Won’t you let me ride you?” I asked her in a loud whisper and she stopped and considered the question and shook her head. Stung, I followed her through the thick growth, looking around and behind me for signs of the beast men. It occurred to me then that there was not room for me here in this part of the forest to safely ride upon her back. There was barely enough room for her to push her way through with her head bowed low against the tangled brush. I would be caught up in the vines and low hanging limbs if I were that high off the ground and I was startled at the wisdom of the animal.


     I tried to peer to the left of me and see the camp and the man as we hurried eastward but the sight of him was blotted out by the trees. What were they doing to him? I wondered. I could hear them shouting now and beating drums and chanting in an unknown language. Savage creatures! Did the man know them from the past? He had spoken of the mountain they called home. Were he and Skaarkap old enemies, perhaps? And if so, how had he eluded them before? We came into a small clearing of sorts and Snow stopped by a rock and turned to look at me. I saw her intention and nodded. She wore no saddle or bridle and there was nowhere to hang my sword but I climbed up on the stone and laying the sword across her back, swung my legs over and took my seat. She took off immediately, almost upsetting me and I grabbed her snowy mane and held on as she picked up the pace and trotted quietly through the woods.


      Darkness fell quickly and we were far from the pale trees now with their comforting lights and it was hard to see. Somewhere out in the density of black trees to my right, I heard a snarl that made me jump and I felt Snow tense her muscles beneath me. I patted her reassuringly and touched my heels to her flanks to hurry her along. Soon, the glow of the campfire began to pierce the darkness and though the trees hid us from sight, I could see the scene off to my left. I gasped. The man was lying on the ground with a sword pointed against his throat and a fat ugly man with long grey hair was tormenting him with a blazing stick of firewood and laughing in a shrill, almost feminine voice. His audience was greatly entertained as they shouted out grotesque suggestions to him. 


     Three men on horseback were surrounding Redemption and holding him by the bridle as he tried to rear and kick them. I saw a stain of red upon the man’s right forearm where his tunic sleeve had been torn away but I saw no indication that he was fighting back. Not with the sword at his throat, anyway. What could he do? He was staring up into the faces of the savage king and his brother without flinching as the flames were held closer to his face. Was he buying time to allow me to make my escape? Was that his plan? Was he sacrificing himself for me? Did he think I would just ride away and leave him there to die at the hands of these monsters? I pondered that question briefly but knew I could do no such thing. “Snow, help me. What should we do?” I asked softly and leaned down close to her ear. She stopped abruptly and listened to something beyond my range of hearing, her ears moving wildly back and forth. “What is it?” I pleaded in fright, now hearing the sounds coming from the forest for myself. The WereMen? Here? Now? Oh, why now!? I moaned. I didn’t know how to defend myself from them and wasn't convinced that I wouldn't faint dead away at the sight of them. My new teacher had not yet schooled me about their traits and habits. I was on my own.


     Snow shook her head and began to gallop down a trail that wound it’s way out of the wood and around the encampment, still shielded by a thick stand of trees. Rushing towards us off to the right, there sounded the thud of fast, heavy feet, a horrible cry and the sensation of inhuman fear. I held onto the horse’s mane for dear life as she flew down the trail like the wind heading straight for the camp. “What are you doing?!” I cried into her ear, not understanding. She was surely running now in blind panic and I wanted to stop her but didn't know how without bridle and bit. Louder and faster came the sounds from the forest, closer now and gaining on us. A horrible growl filled the deepening of the night and I saw the man lying on the ground turn ever so slightly and peer in our direction. The others seemed not to notice as Redemption reared and broke away from his captors. 


     At the last minute, Snow stopped short and pulled behind a thick tall tree, breathing heavily, and looked back around at the trail we had just galloped down. Almost at the same moment, out of the darkness bounded a deer with large antlers and terror in it’s eyes, running straight for us. Behind the animal ran a creature from a nightmare, half upright and half upon all fours, huge and shaggy and brown, with gleaming white teeth and fury in it’s eyes, howling an unearthly cry. I drew my sword back and made ready to attack but at the sight of the campfire and the many men, it fell silent and slowed it’s chase and then stopped some distance away on the other side of the trail. The terrified deer, not knowing what to do, ran towards the camp and straight into the circle of men surrounding the fire. Everything happened so fast then, I could hardly recall it all later. Chaos ensued.


     The appearance of the deer so startled the intruders that they yelled and ran and those on horseback began to race away in fear. Redemption quickly made his way to the man and lowering himself on his front legs, he urged his friend to climb into the saddle and he grabbed his lost sword and did so. Ignoring the creature that watched us with hungry eyes shining in the darkness, Snow swiftly moved out of our place of hiding and flew down the trail behind the fleeing deer and took us down into the circle and to certain death, I was sure of it. She carried me to the side of a horse and rider who had hurried to the outskirts of the camp but I caught the man off guard and ran my sword through him and knocked him from his mount. Snow neighed her approval and we caught up with another fleeing horseman. I knocked the curved knife out of his hands with my sword and he looked at me with a mixture of delight and fury as I carved up his bare chest and kicked him off the black horse with my foot. I didn’t look back. 


     There was no time. My mind shifted into battle frenzy now and I thrust the sword into it’s sheath and grabbed the bow. Four arrows flew through the air and caught four unsuspecting would-be bridegrooms in the throat and they fell on top of one another. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw the man topple three men from their horses with his long sword as Redemption swerved in and out of their unorganized formations just like Starshine used to do. Seeing a huge man with braided hair coming up on the blind side of the man, I let go of an arrow and caught him in the ear, my arrow flying right below the blue-eyed man’s chin. His eyes widened and he looked at me in shock and gratefully nodded his head, smiling.


     The deer could not find his way out of the camp and ran wildly back and forth in the melee, rearing up and thrusting out with panic-stricken legs. I saw the fat man with long grey hair make the mistake of getting in his way and though he threw the burning torch in defense, the deer’s hoof caught him on the side of the head and felled him then and there. “Good for you!” I said aloud as a younger attacker came upon me and I barely had time to draw my sword and meet his with a loud clang. Snow danced away from his horse and he followed us and tried to force us back against the boulders. “Come now, Little Warrior Bride,” he cajoled me and laughed, enjoying the battle. “Why don’t you save your strength for our wedding night?” “I’ll never marry you!” I spat in his direction and jabbed at him but he swerved away and laughed louder.

     “You’ll marry all of us!” he smirked. “Our King Skaarkap, first and then me, his son and Prince! And then of course, the rest of the men of Meerjok Mountain! You are our chosen one and soon to be the mother of our children!” His dark eyes devoured me with longing and confidence and I caught his sword with the tip of mine and threw it into the darkness. “You are mad!” I screamed at him, “You are all mad! One woman cannot be wife to a hundred men! I will see you all dead!” And I kicked Snow with my heels and she fled back toward the fire. The man raced after us and crowded in on Snow until she was hemmed in by three men on horseback. They pushed us close to Skaarkap and his hideous twin and at that close proximity, my stomach churned to lose it’s contents. The monsters grinned down at me, the twin rubbing his childlike hands together and gyrating wildly upon his brother’s shoulders. “Our bride, my BrotherKing!” he cried and reached out for me as I desperately tried to move away.


     Before I knew what was happening, Skaarkap’s huge right arm swooped down and scooped me from my horse and into the saddle in front of him and he raced away across the camp as I screamed and fought. “Help me!” I called to the man as we flew by him in the midst of his own battle and his eyes met mine and his foe’s knife caught him unawares and sliced him across the cheek. The giant horse rode right through the campfire and scattered the burning pieces of wood here and there, never slowing down. The black pan that had held our fish dinner went flying and the leftover potatoes were thrown from their skewers and grabbed up by a tall, thin man with bulging dark eyes and strange markings on his face. He looked up at me crazily while gobbling the potatoes down, with a lusty, sick grin spread across his comical face. Just then, the panicked deer cut back towards us from the horde of men and horses and knocked him into the fire. I heard his head hit the black pan and he screamed and tried to beat out the flames that ran up his shabby shirt and into his hair. I didn’t have time to see what happened next but I hoped the deer would knock down a dozen more before making his escape.


      Reconsidering, I thought he probably had no desire to go back into the forest with the wolf on the prowl and felt safer in the company of these dirty men. I tried fiercely to wrestle the horse’s reins out of my captor’s hands but he just laughed at me, squeezing me tight against his chest and put his hideous head down to breathe in the fragrance of my hair. “She is fresh!” he called back to his brother and the horrible little man reached down and twisted his horrible little hand in my hair and pulled it up to his face. “May I kiss her, Brother?” he asked and at that, I decided that I would rather jump off the horse and die. I elbowed the man in the ribs and bit the hand that held the reins and as he yelped and made to strike me, I quickly twisted around with my dagger and lopped off the ruby stone that protruded from the center of his forehead. He screamed in agony and grabbed the wound with both hands while his twin screamed twice as loud and reached to comfort him.


     Almost at the same time, Redemption raced up beside us and the man yelled “Jump! Quickly!” and reached out to help me as we continued to race through the camp. Blood ran down his face from the attacker’s knife but he paid it no attention. I nodded and reached for his arm but then swung back on the black horse’s neck and drew my sword while holding on the best that I could. Skaarkap and his twin were so intent upon the forehead wound that they did not notice until I roared in my loudest warrior voice and swung the sword in fury and supernatural strength, slicing off the top half of the giant’s head and completely lopping off the head of the tiny brother. Neither of them had had time to scream but as the little head hit the ground and went bouncing off under the hooves of the horses, I saw that his ugly little mouth was frozen in a silent scream and his eyes were wide with disbelief.

     The man grabbed me from my perch and deposited me upon Redemption in front of him and off we flew toward the boulders. I could feel his heart racing against my back as my own thudded violently in my chest. I held out the bloody sword in my right hand and whilst we fled past two of the Meerjok men, I sliced through them and dispatched them to the ground in shock. As we made for the opening of the gray stones, I saw many dead and dying men lying about the camp, some groaning, some shouting hysterically and some running towards their king and his dead twin. “King Skaarkap!” they cried and shook their heads, not believing what their eyes told them. His huge body still sat on the horse’s back, his hands hanging limply at his sides, his mouth slack and his eyes closed and full of blood. The headless twin on his back slumped over him and his tiny hands were around his neck in a gruesome kind of embrace. I could hardly look away.


     We flew to the boulders and hurried behind them.  Snow and the frightened but heroic deer ran after us and sprinted into the arbor that had been built for the horses. The deer was panting so hard he could barely stand and finally just collapsed on the ground and lay there shaking and hiding his great head in the grass. Snow went up to him and nudged him with her nose. It seemed to me that she was attempting to calm him and tell him everything was going to be alright. I watched them in fascination until the man pulled me down off his own heroic horse and gave me a quick embrace. “Are you alright?” he asked, looking me over, “Did they hurt you? Are you wounded?” Smiling, I dropped my sword on the ground and said quietly, “No, the blood on me is not my own but the blood of our enemies and some of thine.” He reached up to touch his cheek and grinned, pulling a handkerchief out of his pocket and dabbling at the cut. “I’ll live.” he said rubbing his wounded arm from which the sleeve had been ripped. “You are quite the warrior, Little Flower.” he murmured to me. “Never have I seen a maiden fight like that. You surprised me.” “And... I saved thy life!” I exclaimed with twinkling eyes. “And I saved thine!” he exclaimed back and I nodded and embraced him. “But what do we do now?” I asked. “Not all of the villains are dead. They will recoup and attack us again, I know it!” He looked deeply into my eyes with a hesitant and forbidding look on his face and opened his mouth to speak but stopped and sighed then gripped my shoulders with his hands.


     “Vaangelika...... I know you’re not going to want to hear this but you must listen! These men are not dead! At least they won’t be for long. I know it looks like some of them are dead but even the leader with half his head gone and his completely headless brother…. they will soon have their heads again and they will surround us and try to take you again.” I stared at him in disbelief and whimpered, “But how can this be? How can one come back after one is dead?” He shook his head and shook me. “Listen, these men are Replicators! They have the ability to rejuvenate themselves and replicate their damaged parts! I know it sounds insane…but you must believe me! These men cannot be killed!” My heart sank in my chest and my legs gave way and I slumped to the ground with his hands still holding me. Looking up, I shook my head slowly and then wildly. “No!” I protested, weeping, “It can’t be true! If this is true, they will take me away to their horrible mountain and make me be wife to them and have their babies! I will not do it! I will fall upon my own sword first! Please! Please, tell me, it’s not true!” I began to cry helplessly and all the strength drained from my body.


      The thought of it was more than I could bear. If they could not be killed, then they would kill him and do with me what they wanted. It was hopeless! He pulled me to my feet and into his arms. “Shh.” he comforted me, stroking my hair, “It is not hopeless. There is a way. You must not lose hope. Never lose hope, Vaangelika. Do you not remember the words of your father in the mouth of the hawk? There is always a way out.” I wanted to believe him but could not see the way myself. I just stared into his blue eyes and forced myself to stop crying. I had just cut off the head of a monster, how could I babble like a mindless child and drown myself in tears? Why did I give up so easily? True, I had never faced an enemy like the one I faced now but I also had never lost a battle. Why concede now when I had three, no, make that, four brave friends who would fight to the death for me and with me?


     I inhaled and pulled myself up by the boots and tried to appear taller than my 5’6″ height. The man smiled and kissed my cheek. “That’s my brave girl! Now, listen to me. You must do exactly as I tell you and you must not be stubborn. Do you agree to obey me?” I nodded and waited for his next words, wondering what he possibly planned to do in light of his revelation. “First, look out and see what is happening in the camp.” he said and turned to see about the horses and their charge, the trembling deer. I went to an opening and peered out at a scene that was beyond my comprehension. All of the men who were not wounded or dead had surrounded their leader and had taken him to the edge of the forest and laid him on the grass. They began chanting in an guttural language, strange and demonic sounding. The horses gathered together in the grass nearby and began to graze, keeping their watchful eyes upon the men and upon the forest behind them, looking I’m sure, for signs of the wolf creature still out there.


      No one seemed to be paying us the slightest bit of attention until one huge man stood up and looked right into my eyes and roared, shaking a fist in my direction. I jumped back, startled, and hid myself behind the rock. “They are…. waiting...for something, it appears.” I told the man. “They are very angry now.” “Waiting for their king to find his head.” he answered sarcastically “And for their brothers to rejoin them in the fray.” “But they are just lying there in their blood.” I protested, not wanting to believe his tale of rejuvenation. “Ten minutes.” he warned me. “I give them ten minutes and then you will see that I am telling the truth. I have never seen this myself but I have been informed of it by my adoptive father.” I rubbed my forehead and sighed, turning back to peek out at the camp.


      Someone had rebuilt the fire and it was blazing up in the darkness, illuminating the encampment. Men took burning torches in their hands and bent low over their fallen comrades and over their king. The loud chant continued and the sounds of the horses’ hooves and the rush of smoky vapor from their nostrils made the scene one of unbelievable vision. I thought I saw one of the still forms begin to move but I could not be sure. One of my daggers protruded from his chest and was hardly visible except for the hilt. I did not see how he could recover from that wound! The man whistled for me and I turned to see him walking away behind the boulders. “Stay here!” he ordered.”Do not follow me. I must be alone now.” And he walked out of my sight, leaving me mystified and with fear returning to my heart. Snow came to my side and leaned against me, buffeting me with her head. I rubbed her white coat and patted her head wishing I had an apple to give as a reward. How human she seemed! How protective of me she was. She barely knew me and yet she had bonded with me even more quickly than Starshine had. I was amazed at her mannerisms.


      Redemption stood watching us near the deer who suddenly decided to stand and join us and we all stood in silence and wondered what terrible thing would befall us next. They seemed to be asking me with their big liquid eyes to please share the escape plan and I shrugged and put my arms around Snow’s neck. When several minutes had passed and the man had not returned, I began to worry and without one thought to his command, ran in the direction he had gone. As I passed the eleventh boulder, I saw him kneeling there upon the ground and heard him speaking in a strange voice, words I did not know. I gasped and stopped short in my tracks and he turned and jumped to his feet.

     “You said you would obey me!” he reminded me angrily and grabbed my arm and began to hurry me back towards the horses. “You promised!” “No, I didn’t.” I said, trying to think of an excuse. “I only nodded in agreement.” He groaned aloud and pushed me ahead of him. “Curious, impudent girl! Your curiosity will get the better of you one day!” “B…b..but..” I started to explain, ” I thought you were not coming back!” He groaned again and went to pat Redemption’s head and whispered into his ear. Then he stroked the deer’s face and nodded at Snow who nodded back at him. “We haven’t much time.” he finally said to me. “So listen carefully and do exactly as I tell you! Do you hear me?” “Yes!” I said petulantly and watched in amazement as he removed his sword, bow and arrows, his daggers and whatever else qualified as a weapon. “What art thou doing?” I questioned him reverting back to my native way of speaking. He ignored me and finished his task and patted Redemption’s head a final time.


      “Lay down thy weapons, Vaangelika.” he said softly and I started to refuse but silenced myself at the sight of his uncompromising face. “Now.” he commanded and I complied, removing every weapon that I had upon me and feeling naked with the compliance. “Shhh!” he warned when I opened my mouth to protest, putting his finger to his lips and taking my hand. “Now do as I tell you and the enemy will be scattered before us. You will see. But do only as I tell thee. Promise or remain here alone.” My eyes widened at his words and I fell speechless and let him lead me out of the opening of the boulders, followed by the horses and lastly, the deer. The deer looked as bewildered as I, but followed his newfound friends out into the clear and present danger before us.


     The man led me out of our only protection and towards the campfire. At the sight of us, the huge men and would-be kidnappers turned from their brothers and stared at us in surprise. But the great surprise was all mine for I no longer saw one slain or wounded man among them.  In fact, they were all mounted now and they parted at our approach and made way for the most truly terrifying sight that my eyes had ever seen. On the gigantic black horse, bathed in the steam issuing from his demonic nostrils, sat the leader of the Meerjoks, Skaarkap and there upon his back, sat the hideous twin with a brand-new head, exactly like the one I had chopped off! I gasped in shock and the giant laughed and all the men laughed with him and the sound echoed throughout the camp and bounced off the boulders.

      Raising his hand to quiet them, Skaarkap shouted, “It has been great fun playing with you, Blue Eyes, but now we must take our new bride and be on our way! The WereMen have informed us that they plan on eating you and the deer for supper and we must not delay their feast! Now give us the woman and prepare for your last meal!” The intruders laughed uproariously at his joke and I felt myself grow pale and tried to pull my hand out of the man’s hand and run for my sword. He held me fast and whispered, “You must do as I say or all is lost!” “Alright!” I acquiesced and stood by his side gritting my teeth. “What must I do? You said they cannot be killed. How can we fight them?” “The battle is not ours nor any mortal’s.” he said softly and with a calmness and a peace that I had never witnessed on any man’s face. I could only stare at him.


     “When I say “Now!” I want you to drop to your knees and cover your face with your arms and do not look up no matter how curious you become or how frightened you might be. Do you understand? Swear this to me!” I looked at him in disbelief and could not find my quick and eager tongue. “Swear it!” he cried and shook me. “There is no time to dally!” “Yes!” I promised him, terrified at the thought of cowering before an approaching enemy. I was halfway thinking that he meant to let them swoop me up and take me away with them. What else could he do in that position? There was no way out! “Yes, I swear it!” I gritted my teeth, not at all resigned to this unthinkable fate. I would simply make one of the giant men kill me whether he wanted to or not. We readied ourselves as they began to move towards us in the firelight. Somewhere in the forest, the wolfman bayed a long and harrowing howl and the hair stood up on my neck and forearms. I swallowed hard and gripped the man’s hand tightly. “Be strong, Vaangelika.” he said to me and quickly kissed my forehead and pulled his hand out of mine. I cried out as he walked some paces ahead of me toward the approaching horde. What was he thinking? Was he going to sacrifice himself for me and what would that possibly accomplish? Nothing made any sense to me. All seemed lost.


     I closed my eyes and thought about my father and my teacher and my nurse and of the mother I never knew. Of the shepherd boy and of Starshine and Snow and the eyes of the frightened deer. I saw the golden viper and the wondrous hawk and the knowing eyes of the white bird. But of all of these that I thought of and cared for, only the man who walked before me, made the heart leap out of my breast and reach to hold him in desperate hands. I had never felt this way about anyone. I didn’t know what it was but I didn’t want to let it go. To let it die. I wanted to hold it forever and be held by it. “Please!” I called to him as the tears flowed down my cheeks, “I don’t even know thy name!” He turned to look back at me and saw my arms reaching out to him and said,  "I do not have a name. So thou canst call me anything you like, Little Warrior.” And he smiled a sad smile that pierced me like an arrow. We were some distance from the boulders and he was even farther away and getting closer to the horsemen all the time. They began to march and chant and to scream out their horrible greetings to me, anticipating their victory and our inevitable defeat. 


     “Our murderous bride, Brother!” the little man exclaimed, waving his fat little hands at me and pounding them upon his brother’s head. “She hasn’t been very nice to Ot-tay and Skarrkap, has she, BrotherKing? We’ll have to punish her, won’t we?” And he rubbed his hands together and whispered into the ear of the giant all manner of horrible things that concerned me. I wondered how close the man intended for them to come to us before he did anything. I could almost feel the heat from the horses’ breaths. They raised their newly formed arms and hands and legs and heads and bodies and prepared to charge at us and end the one-sided battle and be done with it. The man looked up at the boulders and looked back at me and the horses and back to the onrushing tide of regenerated dead men. “Get ready!” he said. “Almost….almost…” And as they prepared to rush to the campfire and cast him aside and take me, the man screamed, “Now!!” and motioned for me to drop as he had instructed. The horses and deer fell to the ground as though dead and lay silently with their eyes tightly shut as if they understood what I did not.


     I balked for a moment and then dropped and curled myself up, covering my face and body as best I could with my arms. “Keep your eyes closed and do not look up!” he cried out to me and he turned to the row of boulders and nodded and fell to the ground himself and prostrated himself in front of the enemy. “We are doomed.” I said to myself under my breath. “We are not doomed!” he shouted back at me and dared me to uncover my face. Within seconds, we began to hear a loud noise coming from behind us, from the area of the gray boulders. I had never heard a sound like that before and cannot describe it. It was almost like an army approaching. An invisible army. “Do not look!” he cried again and I didn’t mean to. Out of the corner of my eye, I began to see a golden glow fill the whole atmosphere and bright and incredible lights appear all around. The brutish horde in front of us gave forth loud and frightening cries and began to rush us in their madness. I couldn’t bear to see but I was terrified not to. It was like we were crouched in the middle of two approaching armies and I had no idea what to do but crouch there. Suddenly, behind us, we heard the sound of horns and heavy marching and the sound of swords being drawn. Just as the band of marauders seemed within mere feet of us, they began to look up into the sky above where we knelt and their eyes widened in disbelief.   They screamed and began to back up and look for somewhere to retreat to but there was nowhere to go. The noise of that great army seemed to fill up the world, and without effort, encompassed the entire camp. They seemed to my frightened ears, more gigantic than the Meerjoks and with no sounds of retreating, but pushing forward, united as one.


     I could have sworn then, that I heard the mighty rush of beating wings like that of great birds, but that couldn’t be real, I told myself. As the army grew closer to where I lay, I began to feel extremely odd. It was almost like the heat of the blazing sun fell upon me.  Then a soft glow enveloped me and soon the sensation of being covered in warm honey from head to toe. I could not grasp the meaning of it nor raise my head to see the source of the sensation. I fell into peaceful, ecstatic surrender and floated rapturously in a state of joy I had never known. My surroundings fled away and I saw only a golden glow, so bright, that I could see it even from behind my hands and closed eyelids.  I began to laugh softly, in a sort of delirium but a madness I did not fear. From a million miles away, I heard the horrified roar of the enemy and heard their monstrous horses trample over one another, attempting retreat. Skaarkap’s unmistakable loud voice cried out “Run! Run, My Brothers for your lives! We cannot defeat this foe!” And I heard them running and screaming through the forest and over the hills and for many miles, screaming and screaming in abject terror.


      The glow kept shining for some time. As the quiet fell around us  it faded into a dim light and then disappeared altogether and the warmth left my body and the bliss, my soul. I lay there in a fetal position until I felt the hand of the blue-eyed man reach out and pry my fingers apart and caress my shoulder and brush back my hair. “It’s alright, Little Flower, we are safe now. The Meerjok have gone. They will not return.” I stiffly tried to sit up and looked blankly into his eyes, silently asking a thousand questions. He pulled me to my feet and held me tightly in his bloody arms and together with the horses and the deer, we looked around us in astonishment at the deserted and silent camp, peaceful and dark now except for the glow of the dying orange fire.

to be continued in Episode 16

The Blue Vineyard Of Voo Shining Stone: WARRIORS OF THE WAY EPISODE 16 Moonlight Madness

 Arvo Pärt - Nunc dimittis